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True story: riding the subway in Manhattan, The Bearded man happened upon a delightful string quartet playing in-between the platforms. When high art meets low brow, anything can happen, and while it’s safe to say that most lookers on were pleasantly surprised, one sneaky gentleman felt the need to steal the bow of the violinist mid-song. Ruining a rare beautiful moment in an otherwise bleak environment, it seemed that humanity’s better nature had lost this fight. Out stepped The Bearded Man, and in a flash, he plucked a handful of hairs from his glorious beard, strung them together on an elongated, stale churro, and applied rat saliva as resin. The day was saved. Let it not be said that The Bearded Man is an enemy of music. That’s why he loves Nicolas Haelg so darn much.
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